Imagine if you will this scene: Kenneth's Kitchen, small(ish) cafeteria/café (I've upgraded it because of the chocolate chip cupcakes) in UP Diliman. A table occupied by our protagonist, one young woman with the look of distress commonly misinterpreted by pigeons as a mating call face of some sort. An unfinished meal of grilled pork spare ribs set on one of those sizzling platter thing is set on the table as well as a lone chocolate chip cupcake left on the tray and a half-finished Coke in can with a straw stuck through the ring. The only other occupant of the table: a black (and somewhat battered) Benetton shoulder bag that could hold any number of items including but not exclusive to sniper rifles and/or rocket launchers, a plastic envelope containing a couple of purple folders and photocopied pages from some random Italian textbook, and a ginormous green jacket stolen from some unknown relative.

The problem: With our protagonist having five minutes left before her next class starts, she decides to abandon the rest of her meal (excluding the cupcake) and just nab said cupcake and Coke and dash off to her fourth floor classroom. Her problem? Two (freakishly small) hands and one too many items to carry even with handy dandy shoulder bag.

After a few seconds of contemplation (can't carry the jacket, the envelope, the Coke AND my cupcake all at once... what if I... no my right arm would be slung over the bag and gosh I'm starting to look silly here just standing and staring at my stuff.) (*Yes I actually do have internal monologues like this. I'm convinced that Scrubs' JD and I timeshare a single brain.) Coming to the realization that jacket = clothing = can be worn, our protagonist announces with no small measure of triumph, "Then I'll just WEAR the damned cupcake."

...

"Wait, there's something wrong with what I just said."

After successfully clearing up any misconceptions people might have of UP students (re: all UP students are smart), our protagonist decides to vacate the scene of her most recent embarrassing incident.

The cupcake winds up in an inner pocket of the jacket.